It Can’t Be That Simple (and Isn’t)
by An Ordinary Man (the novel)
Interesting article in the New York Post today, run under the headline In All Likelihood, You’re Ruining Sex For Your Lady and credited to Alison Maloney of The Sun.
According to the article, a new survey by the Sex Information and Education Council of Canada and Trojan condoms found that an after-sex cuddle boosts female satisfaction by 30%, but that 53% of the dudes “bolt” after they’re done. The study’s author, Robin Milhausen, PhD, states that staying in bed with your partner is “the easiest way” to improve your relationship.
This makes a lot of sense, intuitively – a quick exit might well leave her feeling unloved, used, cheap, etc, and I completely understand that. In fact, I loved to stay in bed to enjoy the physical and emotional after-glow and was surprised that leaving the bed – as opposed to falling asleep – was so common.
Which makes me ask why do they leave? At least a small part of me, in keeping with everything else I’ve written here, wonders if the sex was as consensual as they would have wanted it – was it freely, enthusiastically, willingly, supplied, or was it a grudging if-you-have-to? I would cuddle the provider of the former until the cows came home, but flee from the latter on almost any pretext.
While it is easy to measure how many guys leave the bed, it is harder to measure how many guys were enticed into staying. But yes, he should stay (and stay awake).